In Conversation with…….Donavan

The Community Carnation Ceremony: World AIDS Day, December 1st, 2016

The Toronto People With AIDS Foundation hosted the Community Carnation Ceremony for World AIDS Day December 1st at the 519 Community Centre. A beautifully staged evening with the theme of ‘Touch’ presented on three levels: Welcoming, Healing and Living Touch. Emphasizing the importance of touch in the everyday lives of people living with HIV/AIDS in today’s world.

Several readings were presented to an audience which had obvious and noticeable emotions toward AIDS, living with HIV, and the loss of someone they knew. This evening is difficult no matter which way it is interpreted, revered, or celebrated. Whether it’s the memory of the war that ravaged a community decades ago, the wonder of creating anti-retroviral life-saving medications, or the illness as it is lived today: It is usually coming from a place of pain, tears and hope.

Rather than continued talk about the history of World AIDS Day I found it important to share the observations of someone who participated in the ceremony – and whom is also living with HIV. Sharing thoughts and feelings is yet another thread in the Red Ribbon we know today.

Donavan is a Registered Nurse and Reflexologist who volunteers within the Therapeutic Care programming at PWA.

PD: Why did you agree to speak at this year’s World AIDS Day Ceremony? What were your thoughts toward being asked?

DL: I was really honoured that I get to spread the word. I feel respected when I am asked to do something like that; respected in the community. I was delighted. The feeling I get when someone touches me is an incredible feeling. And when I’m touching somebody and giving a therapeutic treatment touching – with my body – to their body. Touching with my energy – to their energy. The feeling again is just overwhelming, calm, and love and acceptance from both parts. At the end of the treatment no matter who felt bad before – we now both feel good.

PD: Do you see your volunteering and your role in therapeutic care as inspiring to others and why?

DL: Yeah, I find it to be inspiring because I know a lot of people enjoy the treatments and I know a lot of people want more and want to know about it. When I’m giving the treatments they’re often asking me what am I doing what spot am I touching, what part of the body is related to HIV. We talk about what parts of the body may be affected by certain reflexes. So that’s inspirational. Clients come in and they want to know more and they come in with lots of questions, and not just with reflexology questions. Because I’m nursing as well, they have tons of questions for me. And even when I review medical histories with them they’ll ask simple questions.  I strive to provide a whole picture that includes both the medical and the complimentary therapy side.

PD: So, clients are involved in their session with you?

DL: Yes. So, during my session, you know, it is a reflexology treatment but it’s their time. It’s their hour. I always let them know that. They can do whatever they like with that hour. If they want to just be quiet and have their feet treated then that’s what I do. Some people end up talking the whole time and we don’t do feet we just talk about what’s most important for them at that moment in time that’s bugging them. Or they seek guidance. If they feel they’re getting some guidance then the conversation keeps going and we end up with no treatment but we get a good hug in the end. And that’s a good treatment too!

PD: World AIDS Day is always a huge emotional day. What was your build-up-to or your lead-up-to for the event? What was your preparation?

DL: I don’t know the date I contracted HIV but I know it was 29 years ago. Because I don’t have a specific date I’ve always chosen December 1st as my anniversary. So, it’s important on my anniversary to remember that I’m doing a good job with myself and am leading by example. I just think it’s important to take part in spreading the word and letting people know that I’m still alive and surviving and thriving.

PD: Touch was the theme for this year’s World AIDS Day event. Tell me about touch in your real life as a Poz man.

DL: I never felt anybody not touch me because of my poz status. In fact I’m quite shocked sometimes when people will get up and shake my hand. Especially when we are working with 2nd year med students and they know we’re are positive and I walk in and “Hello, my name is Donavan.” They get up and shake my hand, right? That’s an incredible move on their behalf because I’m there to coach them as doctors on how to interact with people who are HIV positive but they get up and touch me.

PD: It’s not like the 90’s or the 80’s. Where they would question touch?

DL: In the 80’s I was still in high school and AIDS was a joke. We weren’t educated properly about HIV or taught about stigma. My HIV came from a girl, not from a guy. Everyone thinks because I’m gay that’s how I got it but that’s not true. People have always touched me and I’ve always touched people physically and emotionally all throughout my life and HIV has never gotten in my way. I just won’t let it.

PD: It’s good that you don’t let your HIV status get in the way.

DL: And they won’t let it either.

PD: Will you work toward inspiring others to participate in World AIDS Day for next year?

DL: I will now that I’ve experienced my first real working World AIDS Day project, as opposed to just at celebrating at home or writing something on the internet. To take part in such an event was wonderful and healing and therapeutic. I mean who receives 75 hugs in 5 minutes? That was just truly the most amazing part of my evening, I was crying. If something makes me cry then it needs to be shared, because it’s emotional. People know my emotions and when I’m passionate about something I don’t need to ask people – I find that people will often ask me “What can I do? How can I join?” I find I do inspire people that way. I don’t need to seek out people. I’ll ask people if they are interested but often they approach me which is nice.

Written by Philip Dawson for PWA

 

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